Assigned Seating
“Every year they ask for suggestions and every year I make
the same one: assigned seating.”
This was the topic of conversation among the survivors of
the war-torn auditorium for Time Out for Women.
Bonded by shared suffering, those who had escaped trampling,
hand-to-hand combat, and general cattiness settled in for a full day of
uplifting religious speakers and performance artists with their nearest and
dearest female friends and family.
What a way to set the tone for the day!
Maybe the organizers hadn’t noticed that the seats are
numbered and people tend to buy tickets in a block anyhow?
Maybe they don’t realize how bad it is in the trenches?
Where good, Christian women rip reserved signs off chairs
without remorse or make their own look-alike signs to sneak in the night
before?
Where the mad dash from the long wait on the cold hallway
floor makes Black Friday look like a church picnic?
It’s every woman for herself out there and so no hard won
ground will be yielded.
But assigned seating would fix all of that.
Yes, assigned seating is the answer.
I wonder how many of these same women attended the
first-come-first-served seating event the very next day?
Where all baptized members of the church in the entire state
of Utah were invited to gather with their nearest and dearest friends and
family for spiritual uplift in the temple and packed meetinghouses across the
state, preceded by orderly and loving assembly?
No assigned seating required.
